I’m curious about this very subject… do we, in fact, demand too much from our relationships? In reality, in the best of relationships, only twenty-five percent of our needs are met. So what does this mean to those of us who are continuously unsuccessful in finding someone to share love with? Well maybe, just maybe, we’ve been chasing this whole relationship issue up the wrong tree, so to speak. Maybe we’re looking for one person to meet too many of our needs in a close, personal relationship. What does finding an equal mean? What is the most important quality for you to find in someone you want to open your heart to? Are you secretly doing the same thing that congress does… ‘earmarking your relationship bill’ with all sorts of non-essentials? Or, in a reaction to what you didn’t have in the past, are you inadvertently packing your list of wishes for a mate with ALL that you didn’t have in the past?
I’d like to know what you’ve learned from your own experience! Have you learned that you were doing just that? Have you demanded to much in the past? Have you seen that, in relationships, as in most of the rest of life, that less is most definitely more?
http://www.midlifeheart.com/
One of the most difficult aspects of being human, and single, is loneliness. Without human interaction and touch, most of us, in time, would go stir crazy. Loneliness is something that we, as humans, are confronted by throughout life. As most of us know, to experience consistent loneliness while being part of a couple is the worst form of loneliness ever known.
So my question to all of you is, how do you deal with loneliness when it appears in your life? I know what I do, what do YOU do??
http://www.midlifeheart.com/
Lately I’ve been thinking about the nature of attraction in my dating and romantic life. I find that attraction in and of itself is only the first layer of a multi layered subject. It’s in that thought that I bring this to you… to make you think and to ask for your input as well.
Attraction is based on a lot of different factors for different people we meet. For some, it’s based in our childhood triggers that were originally set by our parents. However, for most it’s a complicated set of additional factors. We can be attracted to someone on a visceral level (the ‘hot guy’ or the ‘smokin hot woman’) that we just want to get naked with and ‘have fun’. Yet, we can also have our initial attraction based on a more intellectual level (‘you challenge my mind more than anyone ever has before’), or their personality (‘you are just so FUN to be around… I want to see you more’). Our attraction to someone can also be based on a more spiritual level (‘we both believe in the same things and can talk about them all so freely… it’s so RARE to meet someone like you’).
However, from my own experience, I have never been attracted to one simple aspect of anyone. With that said, I believe that it’s important for us to understand the nature of our attraction to someone to make sure that what we’re attracted to is an aspect that is deeper and meets our real needs as opposed to something that is more shallow… being something that may not be able to last.
Your thoughts and comments would be appreciated on this one. Am I totally off base here or does this ring true with many more of you?
http://www.midlifeheart.com/
One thing that I feel is very important for everyone to realize is that everyone (virtually without exception) has baggage. It’s practically unavoidable since we’re all human beings who carry around a certain amount of unprocessed emotional energy. Some of us carry more and some of us carry less. Yet, some of us have completed the necessary work to remove a great deal of it from our lives. However, as many of us soon learn, there is always more baggage to uncover.
Baggage not only appears in the emotional form, but also in the form of unresolved financial and life issues, and unresolved issues that come from an unhealed ex-spouse. The important aspect in all of this is that (with rare exception) we all have some form of baggage!
Baggage in and of itself is neither bad nor good. The important aspect of baggage is how we deal with it. Does our baggage rule us in dramatic outbursts or do we look at it, accept it and deal with it as it rears its ugly head, or as we’re able to do so?
(This is an edited excerpt from the book, “Midlife Metamorphosis” due out this summer.)
http://www.midlifeheart.com/
It’s so funny. You write, work, gather up a lot of faith and keep writing. Some days you know that you have the most important things in the world to say and other days you feel rabidly delusional. Such is the life of a writer/author. Yet… this is my first book, so the territory I’m traveling is virgin to me. Within the last week or so the book moved into the publishing phase and now all of my efforts (along with the support and effort of friends) is coming to fruition. As of Friday, April 10, 2009 there are roughly 12 weeks until the book is ready for sale. Please continue to return to the blogs as well as the website for further updates regarding the progress of Midlife Metamorphosis.
http://www.midlifeheart.com/
|
Dating and Your Midlife Heart "This blog is for all of you between the ages of 40 and 60 who find yourselves divorced, confused and frightened by the new world of midlife dating, and need to make sense of it all. It’s a place for me to not only share with you what I’ve learned, but for all of you to share what you’re learning and to ask questions as well… not only of one another, but of me too. While my second marriage was imploding in 1998, I found myself on a new journey as the world around me was in the midst of rapid change too. At the time, dating sites were very new and incredibly primitive (does anyone remember early Match.com?). However, even then the uniqueness of dating in midlife had already become evident in the rapidly emerging ‘techno-realm’ of the world-wide-web. I now consider myself to be someone who is ‘seasoned’ (to say the least) when it comes to dating in midlife... not because I wanted to learn that skill, but simply from mistakes and experience. I’ve learned a lot that I can pass on to you in hopes of saving you some of the mistakes that I've made as well as helping you move forward with your heart as easily as possible."
~~Jim Rogers, Chatsworth, CA Contact the Author Jim Rogers is available for book signings, speaking engagements, and media appearances. To book an appearance or to contact him with comments or questions on the book, Click Here.
|
Recent Comments